Undercover! Excuse the crappy title
by Pheonix245
Summary: Summary inside.... contains yaoi yuri and a straight couple....well.....maybe.... Chapter is up!
1. Prologue

Tally: Wow... I have a good idea for this fic!!!!

Jou: That's a first...

Robin: It is her first story that she's gonna finish on this site...

Tally: -glares- I hate you...

Summary is ...

Joey, Malik, and Tea aren't real people. Soon, the Kaiba Bro's, Yugi, Yami, Bakura, and Ryou will find out. Their part of an organization called th SRP. People say it stands for Shadow Realm Protection. They are right. Joey, Malik, and Tea are really the best team in the agency. Their called the AT Team. Joey's the leader. Malik's the fighter. Tea's the specialist. Wanna know the best parts. That's not even their real names. And they have outfits and shadow monsters. This is Yaoi and Yuri. You have been warned.

Gawd! My summary's suck!!!

Chaos & Don: Tally owns nothing.

* * *

_**Prologue **_

_5 Years Ago_

"Jou, Anzu, Marik, It's so good to see you again," Said a man whose face was barely visible, behind a desk and who sat in a chair, " How was the mission in Egypt?"

Three figures stood before the man. The one with blond hair and red eyes talked first.

"It went smooth, except for the fact that our covers were almost blown by a certain yami...," He said.

"Thank you, Jou," The man said. Jou bowed, "Marik, you have to contain your yami more accurately."

The boy with tan blond hair and purple eyes nodded.

"Yes, but only if he stays in the rod," Marik said. The girl of the group had brown hair and blue eyes. She smiled.

"It's so good to see you again, Persia." The man nodded at the girl.

"Nice to see you, too, Anzu," Anzu nodded.

Jou had blond hair and red eyes. He wore a black silk shirt that reached just below his knee. It was ripped at the sides from the waist down. It had a red imprint of a dragon down the front. He also wore black silk pants that hugged his legs but spread at the bottom. It also had red imprint at the bottom. He had black slippers that hugged his feet. He was the imprint of a black beauty. The Red Eyes Black Dragon hugging his neck was a nice touch. And yes, its real.

Anzu has blue eyes and brown hair. It was down and she wore a sky blue and purple hat . It had imprints of silver butterfly's on it, along with numbers on the rim. She had light purple shirt and a blue dress on with a purple collar. On her right arm was a tattoo, purple, of a clock. She also had a purple tie on and her purple wings did not go unnoticed. She had on purple boots. She had the Petite Dragon with her, in her arms. She was like a dancer.

Marik had tan, blond hair and purple eyes. He had on a tan shirt and leather blue pants. He had a gold ring around his arm and two bracelets. On his left arm he had an tattoo of the millennium symbol. In his belt, he held a rod with the same symbol on it. He was the only one of the group who looked normal. He had a red bird on his shoulder called the Winged Dragon of Ra.

The man behind the desk was Persia. He wore a tan suit and a red tie. You couldn't see his face. No one had ever seen his face, or lived to tell. He got out a few files and handed them to Jou. Jou rose his eyebrow.

"A new mission already?" He asked.

"As leader of your team, you should know that this is voluntary," Persia said to Jou. Jou nodded.

" I want you and your team to befriend those people. They are your new mission. We believe that the Dark Court are after them. You all are to be under cover. Do not tell them who you are."

"So you want us to befriend Seto Kaiba, Mokuba Kaiba, Yugi Mouto, And Ryou Bakura?" Marik asked. Persia nodded.

" You shall go under names of people who aren't in Domino. Jou, your name will be Joey Wheeler. Marik, yours is Malik Ishtar. Anzu has the name Tea Gardener. Do you understand?"

"Hai!" They replied. They left the agency to their new mission, but this one has love awaiting the agents along with mischief.

* * *

Tally: Yay!!!! That was fun!!! The first person and I will update. I have the whole story finished! All I need is reviews!!!!! 

Robin: Well that's a first...

Tally:-glares- Shut up...


	2. Hacking

Tally: Yay!!!! I got me 1 Review!!!! Thanx _**Lyner137**_!!!!!

Robin: -sweatdrop- She's actually doin the next chapter...

Tally: -hits Robin- Of course!!! I always keep my word!!!!

Jou: Then what about those other stories that...

Tally: Did you go in my room again? -glares-

Jou: -nervous- uhh... no?

Tally: JOU!!!!!!!!!! -runs after Jou-

Jou: AHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!-runs to the bathroom-

Tally: YOU CAN'T HIDE IN THERE FOREVER!!!!!!

Jou: I CAN TRY!!!!!

Robin: -sweatdrop- Tally-san doesn't own Yu-Gi-Oh...

* * *

_**Chapter 1**_

_5 Years Later_

"Yahoo!!!!!" Joey, or Jou, yelled as he and the gang exited the school building.

"Joey! Don't scream so loud!" Yelled a teacher. Joey flicked her off.

"Why should I care? Its the last day of school!!!!" Joey yelled. Tristan grabbed Joey by the neck and gave him a noogy.

"Ya got that right!" He yelled. Yugi laughed and Tea/Anzu sighed. Malik/Marik chuckled at Joey's rambling. Yami blinked. So did Bakura.

"What's wrong?" Ryou asked.

"I never want to go to your last school day ever again!!" Bakura yelled as he cowered behind his hikari.

"For once, we agree on something, Tomb robber," Yami said as he stood behind Yugi. Yugi and Ryou blinked.

"Why?" Yugi asked.

"Joey is WAY too hyper for a normal mortal," was the answer they got from their scared yami's.

"I have to go home!!!!" Tea said as she ran in the direction of her house. Joey waved at her.

"I have to, too. Sister will have a fit if I'm late," Malik said as he ran the same direction as Tea.

"Joey, what about your dad?" Yugi asked. Joey blinked.

"Oh boy. I better go! See you guys tomorrow!! I have to cook dinner!" And with that Joey ran across the street. When he was a good distance away from the group, he ran the same way Malik and Tea did. He came upon an apartment. He opened the door to be glomped by a small flying dragon. He chuckled as he was led down the hall to the living room. On the couch was Anzu, Marik, and Ishizu. Anzu smirked, Marik giggled, and Ishizu frowned.

"What?" Joey asked.

"Go and cook!" Ishizu yelled.

"God knows why you guys don't even know how to boil an egg!" Jou(Tally: I'll call them their real names every time their at their house or not with their friends)said. He walked to the kitchen and started to look for something to cook.

"Hey!" He yelled at the others, "What do you want for dinner?"

"Schnitzel!" They yelled. Jou chuckled. It was no secret in this home that everyone loved schnitzel. Especially Jou's.

"Okay," Jou said to himself. He was the leader of his team. He was also the best hacker in the world and mechanic. His IQ is higher than Kaiba's. People know him as Jou or by his number, #2056. He was really famous. As to why he's dressed as a high schooler. He was tall and had blond hair and golden brown eyes. He wore a white jacket and a yellow tee-shirt. He had black leather pants on, too. Jou loved computers and had his own laptop. It had all the mission data on it and A few of his personal Data. His dragon was disguised as a black cat. His name was Yamahiro or Yama for short.

Anzu was the specialist of the team. She knew everything about everyone for the mission. She could lie through her teeth and get information for anything in less then an hour. Anzu was known to the world as the Knower. She loved gossip. She was dressed as a Dancer. She had on a yellow tank top and pink shorts. With those were a blue belt and a purple collar. Her pet was a golden retriever named Yuki. He was Anzu's Petite Dragon in disguise.

Marik was the fighter of the team. He knew every type of fighting. Jou and Anzu knew how to fight, too, but not as good as Marik. Jou practiced San Soo and Anzu practiced the swords. Marik knew all those styles and mastered all the fighting skills. He looked like a punk. He had on a black sleeve-less shirt and blue jean pants. He had a bird that was also the Winged Dragon of Ra. His name was Tohru. Marik was the only one of the group with a yami. His name was Malik. He almost killed them in a mission five times and almost blew their cover six times. He was held in the Millennium Rod. He hadn't came out of it for the last five years. Marik grounded him for six years.

Bing!

Jou looked at the stove and noted that the dinner was almost done. He was finishing up the mashed potatoes and the corn.(Tally: This is my Fave Dinner menu!!) He sighed.

"Ishizu! Come set the table!" Jou ordered. She came in and grabbed four plates, forks, and knives.

Ishizu was Marik's sister. She owned a museum. She could see the future. Even though she wasn't on the team, didn't make her a bad ally. She got us settled for our mission and came with us every mission we had. She kept Marik and Malik in check. She was a soothsayer. She had black hair and purple eyes. She was the oldest of the group. She wore a tan dress and a gold necklace. Her dress was long and had sleeves. Her necklace was known as the Millennium Necklace.

"Dinners ready!" Jou announced as he put the bowels on the table. They came in and ate.

"Yum!!" Anzu said as she finished her helping. She cleaned off the table. Jou took out his laptop and started to type stuff.

(At Kaiba's Mansion)

"Hmm," Kaiba said as he looked at the Hacker Code.

"Big Brother?" Mokuba said.

"Yes?" Kaiba replied.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm going to get information on this world famous hacker."

"You mean hacker #2056?" Mokuba asked.

"Yes, his name is Jounouchi Katsuya. I want to see how good he is."

"So your gonna hack into his system and steal his records?" Mokuba asked. Kaiba smirked.

"Yes, I am."

Kaiba started to type. He didn't know that Jounouchi was actually Joey. Wait and see how Jou's gonna react to this.

(With the AT Team)

"Fucker," Jou said out loud. Everyone looked at him. He smirked, "Some amateur hacker is trying to get my files."

Jou started to type. _Let's see how you like my virus'._

"Jou has that look in his eye," Ishizu said.

"He's giving someone a virus." Marik explained. Jou got up and changed to his original form.

"I'm going to see how Kaiba likes my T virus." And with that he took his laptop and jumped out the window.

(Kaiba)

"He's part of the SRP agency," Kaiba said.

"You mean that world class agency for undercover agents?" Mokuba asked. Kaiba nodded.

"Let's see what you look like," Kaiba said.

(Outside Kaiba's window)

Jou could see from the tree he was in that Kaiba was trying to get his picture. Jou smirked. He started to type on his laptop.

(Kaiba)

Just when the picture was uploading, the screen went blank. Kaiba blinked. So did Mokuba. It came back on and started to type words.

_**Trying to steal my info.? My aren't we Nosy.**_

Kaiba's eyes widened.

"B-big brother?" Mokuba was scared.

_**You will LOVE my sense of taste...KAIBA!!!!!**_

Mokuba and Kaiba started to stutter.

"W-what's he gonna do? Kill me?" Kaiba said. Jou smirked from outside. He could hear him.

_**A virus isn't that messy...do you REALLY want me to kill you?**_

"He can hear me?" Kaiba asked.

_**Of course!**_

"Big B-brother! This is scary!"Mokuba wailed.

_**You want scary? Keep hacking into my files and I WILL kill you!**_

Mokuba stared at the screen.

(Outside)

Jou was loving the fact that they were scared. He was finished writing the virus now he needed the key word to upload it. He typed one last sentence.

_**For now, I'll leave you with a VIRUS!!!!**_

He saw them stare wide-eye at the computer. He typed the key word.

(Kaiba)

They bawled at the computer.

_**SMILE!!!!!!**_

They stared at it as the computer blanked. Every saved data was erased. Kaiba slammed his hands down.

"That bastard!" Kaiba yelled. Mokuba was recovering from the shock when a voice sounded through the intercom.

"Whose a bastard, Kaiba?" The voice asked.

"Who are you?!" Kaiba asked, but felt stupid when he did. Was he talking to the intercom?

"Jou," Was all it said.

"What do you want?"

"Just to tell you that if you try to hack into any file from the SRP Agency, I will hold my word. Ja Ne!!"

The voice left the boys very stunned.

"Big brother, Can I sleep with you tonight?" Mokuba asked. Kaiba nodded.

* * *

Tally: Cliffy!!!!!

Robin: If you want her to update then review!!!!


	3. Stress

Tally: Hi!!!!!!! People, just so ya know...I am obsessed over Jou, so no questions on why I tease Kaiba...Although I love them as a couple.

Robin: She read the second review from _**Lyner137**_. Three chapters in a row...wow am I impressed.

Tally: Shut up -glares- just so yall know, italics are Jou's thoughts.

Jou: I'm the main character of the story? YAY!!!!!

Tally:-hits Jou with a pole- It's because your my dear brother...so if ya don't wanna be a dead brother, you'll stay out of my room!!!!!

Jou: -unconscious- XX

Tally: I don't own anything. If I did, I would be havin this on TV!!!!!

* * *

_**Chapter 2**_

When Jou got home, Marik asked him a ton of questions. Anzu and Ishizu just stood there and blinked. Anzu wanted to know, too, but Ishizu would tell her later. Ishizu was standing there wondering how on Earth Jou got to Kaiba's house in less than 10 min. so fast. She had told Marik through mind link. He was WAY too hyper. Jou got frustrated.

"Marik, I swear to Ra that if you ask another question, I will start another World War!!!!" Jou screamed. Marik shut up. Jou breathed.

Everyone at the agency knew what happened a half a century ago. Jou started World War 1 and 2. He went into a riot when the us thought that Japan dropped nuclear bombs on them. Of course, it was our Leader who did that. Jou started a lot of wars. They all made history. He started the Civil War, World War 1 and 2, the Crusade, and the Korean War. Anzu made a few wars, too. Such as the Boston Tea Party and The French and American Revolution. Marik cause one war, the Revolutionary War. Jou did all the massacres. He had fun, too. Right now, he was planning World War 3, but he needed a subject.

"Alright, everyone to bed," Ishizu announced. Jou smirked.

"You want to fondle with Anzu?" Jou teased. Anzu and Ishizu blushed three different crimsons. Marik giggled. Everyone in the house was Bi and it was no secret that Anzu and Ishizu were in an affair. Jou and Marik headed to their bedroom. They shared a bedroom. They were separated by a bamboo wall. Jou added a door in the middle for more privacy. He also made his part soundproof. Marik and Malik were in an affair, too. Jou was the only one in the house who was a virgin. Marik would tell him he needed to get laid. He would deny it. He stared at Marik.

"Don't let Malik in my part tonight," Jou said. He went into his side and closed the bamboo door. His room was half the normal size so he didn't have much. He sometimes wished that he could have gotten the guest room. Jou's room had no bed. It had a little nest that Yama was sleeping in. It had a wide screen monitor for a huge computer. There was a chair in the middle of the room. In the corner of the room was a bookshelf. There was a closet full of winter blankets though he didn't need it. His team didn't know what his room looked like. If they did, he would have a bed. They would be worried that their leader was sleeping in midair. Jou didn't like beds. The springs were too damn annoying.

Jou sighed as he laid on the floor. He fell asleep in no time. His head was propped up on his arm so his elbow was on the floor. His leg was bent and the other was spread straight. A sphere surrounded Jou and he started to float in the air. It was called spirit sleeping and it took little energy. Jou slept in a dreamless state of peace. It was the first sense of rest he had for a while.

_**The Next Morning**_

Jou woke up to the smell of burning toast. He yelped as he suddenly hit the floor. He had forgotten that he was sleeping in a spirit sleep. He got up and ran out of his room. He exited Marik's room since no one was in there. He checked Ishizu and Anzu's room and found that they were nowhere to be found, either-besides Yuki and Tohru-. He ran to the kitchen to find Ishizu and Marik trying to douse a fire in the toaster and Yama and Anzu trying to open the windows. No one had noticed he had woken up. He was in too much stress to deal with this. He hacked Kaiba's computer and fought with 16 Tao's the day before. The others didn't know that, or did they? Jou rolled his eyes. They still didn't notice him there. He decided on something else.

_**Marik P.O.V**_

We were all trying to cook breakfast for Jou. He was so stressed since he came home two days ago. He didn't notice that we were worried. I scanned his mind and found that he hadn't slept longer than 4 hours for a week and he was attacked by 16 Tao's. God, those things were feisty and then he had to stop Kaiba from getting all those files of the team. If he found out that I scanned his memory, he would kill me. I also noted when I did a scan that he had no bed in his room. I know he's sensitive to the touch so I decided to get one of the beds without springs for him. It was coming today. Anyway, we were cooking and then Sister started a fire. Me and her tried to put it out while Anzu and Yama opened the windows. I felt another presence in the room. Then I heard a foot tapping.

Ahem.

We froze and looked at the doorway to see...ohhh the leader. He looked stressed, tired, and angry. He was tapping his foot which meant that he didn't approve of us in his kitchen. We doused the fire and cleaned the mess. We went to the couch while he stood, pacing in front of us. Wow, did he look angry.

_**Normal P.O.V**_

Jou glared at the four on the couch. They had done things that could have jeopardized the mission before, but now he feared that they were going to get hurt.

"What were _you _thinking!?" Jou lectured. The group flinched at this, " Not only did you guys try to cook, but you also almost burn down the house!?"

Marik mumbled something. Jou stared at him.

"Speak up."

"We found out that you were stressed out, so we wanted to help out a little."

The others nodded. Jou blinked.

"Why on Earth would I be stresses?" Jou asked. He didn't know how they found out, but he wasn't about to let them worry over him.

"Marik did a mind scan on you," Anzu said. Jou's eyes widened. He glared at Marik.

"What have I told you about reading each others thoughts?" Jou asked.

"You said not to have Malik read other people's minds."

"Then why-" Jou was cut off.

"Because you said nothing about me," Marik said. Jou sighed. He sat on the chair across them.

"So what? I'm stressed. Big deal," Jou joked. Ishizu glared at him.

"Big Deal? Jou, this is very big. If you are too stressed, then your body will fail," Ishizu said.

"What do ya want me to do?" Jou asked.

"You are going to do nothing. We are going to," Anzu said. Jou rose his eyebrows.

"What did you do?" Jou asked.

"They did nothing, I did," said a voice from the TV by the side of the room.

"Persia?" Jou asked. It was indeed Persia.

"Jou, I am giving you a new mission." Jou groaned, "You are to go to my resort for a week and relax. There is a village that your staying at, too. The bed is made of foam and you will be living in the penthouse for a week."

Jou blinked. He pinched his arm.

Again.

Once more for good luck.

Ow.

"This mission is mandatory." Persia continued, "My limo will be picking you up in two minutes and your stuff is packed. It will just be you on this trip. You'll be going to the ski resort in Northern Japan. It is owned by me so expenses are paid for. Have fun."

Honk Honk!!!

Marik and Ishizu pushed Jou out the door. There in the front of the complex was a red limo and all his clothes. He was pulled into the car and on to an indoor bed. It was made of foam. It was very comfortable. He fell asleep, instantly.

_**A few hours later**_

Jou woke up to find himself in a white foam bed. The room he was in was damn well expensive,

too. _This must be the penthouse?_ Jou got up and stretched out the muscles that were sore. That bed had done wonders. He slept so good. It was the first bed he slept on since 1892. Jou walked over to the window and stared at the view he had. It was amazing. He could see the mountains ans the ski lift. There was a little village down by the lodge. He could see the cyber cafe. He was glad he had brought his laptop with him. Boy, was this gonna be fun.

Knock.

Knock.

_Who could that be?_

Jou walked to the door and opened it to see...

Aw crap.

Seto Kaiba was at his door.

And his brother.

Mokuba Kaiba.

That wasn't what was annoying Jou.

Seto Fucking Kaiba was at his door. This was supposed to be _his_ vacation. He didn't want to watch over Kaiba and his brother for a week! Jou glared at Kaiba. Kaiba narrowed his eyes. Mokuba squealed.

"Jou, What are you doing here!?" Mokuba asked.

"I'm on vacation. What are _you_ doing here?" Jou asked.

"We're on vacation, too! But only for a week."

"I didn't know they allow Mutts in this hotel? Shouldn't you be staying in the lodge?" Kaiba sneered. Jou smirked.

"I rented the penthouse for a week," Jou said. Kaiba frowned.

"So that's why they canceled my room here. It was the penthouse," Kaiba growled, "What gives you the bright idea to steal out room?"

Jou blinked. Persia kicked Kaiba and his brother out of his penthouse just for him. Wait a minute. Did the say they had a reservation? Jou's eyes narrowed. He glared at Kaiba.

"What do you want Kaiba?" Jou asked in a dangerous low tone. It was the same voice he used for the hacking the day before. Kaiba blinked.

"We were gonna ask you if you have any towels we could borrow?" Mokuba cut in. Jou nodded and grabbed some towels out of the closet and shoved it in Kaiba's face. He slammed the door in their face. He waited 2 minutes and grabbed his laptop. He connected it to Persia's computer. Persia came on the screen.

"_Persia,"_ Jou hissed.

"Yes Jou?" Persia asked.

"What the hell is Kaiba doing here?" Jou asked.

"He's there for vacation. I kicked him out of the penthouse and moved him in the room below your. There is a camera in there. Its so you can relax and do your mission." Persia smirked.

Jou got this felling that he wanted to violently bang his head on the wall.

He groaned.

* * *

Tally: Another Cliffy!!!!

Robin If you want to know the next part then review.

Jou: And no flames, Onee-Chan hates them.


	4. Cafe

Tally: Hi! I've got 2 questions. One why is my only reviewer _**Lyner137**_? Number 2 is the question, is it possible for guys to get pregnant?

Robin: . ; Tally-san, why are you asking that question?

Jou: Does it look like I can get pregnant? No? Then there's your answer!

Tally: I own nothing except for some oc's and some YGO cards.

* * *

_**Chapter 3**_

When Jou finished yelling profanities at Persia, he decided that he would go snowboard. Jou was really good at snowboarding. One of his old missions had him up in the Alps, so in his free time, he snowboarded. He grabbed his laptop and put it in a bag that went around his shoulder. He put on a winter coat and some snow goggles. He put on some sweat pants and some boots. Under his coat, his laptop bag was safe from the cold. He ran out the door with a spare snowboard that Persia put next to his table. When he got to the ski lift, (Tally: Dudes, I'm skipping the part when he drives a mile on the outskirts of the village because it was borin!!!) he sat down and waited for it to take him up. When he reached the top, he went and found a good spot to start. He hooked his feet to the board and started to get ready.

_One…_

_Two…_

"Joey!!!!" A female voice called.

_Damn!!_

Jou turned and faced Mai Valentine. Well, that's not her real name. That's her code name. Mai is also an agent from the SRP. She had a team with Otogi and Rishid. Her real name is Mai Kujaku. She's the leader of her team called the Golden Tom Team. Ryuji Otogi is the hacker of the group. His name outside the agency is Duke Devilin. He was no where near as good as Jou, but he was good. Rishid Ishtar was Ishizu and Marik's brother. He was the specialist and a damn good one at that, but still not as good as Anzu. Mai was the Fighter, Her teacher was Marik.

"Mai! It's good to see you again!" Jou replied as Mai came up to him on her skis.

"What are you doing here?" She asked.

"I'm taking a week vacation," Jou said, "What are you doing here?"

"I and my team are on a mission to stop some cyber thieves. So, how's the vacation for the best hacker in the world?" Mai whispered. Jou frowned.

"Bad, my case has followed me," Jou replied, bitterly.

"Oh yeah! You're still on that Dark Court case. I thought that Kaiba and his brother were your case?" Jou nodded.

"They followed me," was all he said before he slid down the mountain.

"Hey! Wait for me!" Mai called as she came down, too.

They slid down at fast speed. Jou did a few tricks. They kept on going down till Jou saw Mokuba in his path. His and Mai's eyes widened as they tried to stop. Mokuba turned and almost pissed when he saw Jou make a sharp turn and run into a pile of snow. He and Mai winced as they ran to see if he was alright.

"Ohh, that's gotta hurt," Mai said as she helped Jou get out from the snow.

"I am so sorry Joey!" Mokuba said, "I didn't see where I was going. I was trying to find the Cyber Café and I got lost."

"Its ok kid," Jou said, "You said the Cyber Café? I was gonna go there when me and Mai finished down the mountain."

"Mai?" was all Mokuba asked as he looked at her. She waved at him.

"Hey Kiddo, long time no see!" Mai said.

"Hi Mai!!" Mokuba chipped, "Are you and Joey dating?"

Jou and Mai looked at each other. They burst out laughing. Mokuba looked puzzled so they let him in on the joke.

"Mokuba, Mai's a Lesbian," Jou said, "She already has a lover."

"Who?" Mokuba asked.

"I'm Serenity's lover, kid," Mai said. Mokuba's eyes grew wide.

"Wow! So does that mean that Joey's gay?" He asked.

"No, it means I'm bi," Jou answered, "Mai, can you take my gear to your lodge? I'm going to the Cyber Café with the kid." Mai nodded as she took Jou's board, thick coat (Tally: He had a longer brown jacket underneath.) and his goggles. Jou pulled a scarf out of his bag and put it on.

"Let's go kiddo," Jou said as he led Mokuba down to the café.

_**12 minutes later**_

"Where have you been, Mokuba!?" Kaiba asked his brother when he had come through the café with Jou.

"Well, I got lost and almost crashed into by Joey. I walked in the mountain trail and was almost run over by him if he didn't make that turn and hit that snow pile then I would have been crushed!" Mokuba protested. Kaiba's eyes narrowed at Jou. Jou raised his eyes brow.

"What?" He asked.

"You almost ran over my brother!?" Kaiba roared. Jou blinked.

"Eh, yeah?" Jou looked at the café doors as two men with all black on came in. He narrowed his eyes, "I'm going to the bathroom."

Just when he did, five more men came in. Jou went into the asexual bathroom and locked the door. He pulled out his laptop and hooked it up to the café security cam. He watched as the seven men pulled out weapons and ordered the customers and employers to gather in the corner. Two of the men watched the hostages as one went on a computer and logged on. He was hacking into the SRP Files. The four others grabbed all the money in the cashier.

_How cliché. _

Jou grabbed his cell and dialed Mai's number.

Ring.

Ring.

Rin-

"Hello?" Mai answered. Jou grinned.

"You might want to come to the Cyber Café. Your thieves are doing their things," Jou hung up the phone and started to type. He kept his eyes on the screen and his ears open. He could hear everything. On his screen was the camera on one side and him typing the link to the computer that the thief is on the other. When he finished he decided it was time to have some fun.

"Yama?" Jou whispered. In a red flash, a black cat was sitting on the sink. Jou smirked.

"What do you want, Jou?" Yama asked.

"Two things. You're having this vacation with me," Yama's eyes lit up, "and its ball time." Yama grinned.

"Yay!!! Who're we killing today?" Yama asked.

"Thieves."

Yama looked at the computer screen and smirked.

"Saving our charges?" Yama asked. Jou nodded.

"Let's have some fun and you can have some dinner."

Jou started to type.

_**Café**_

The man on the computer was busy hacking into the SRP system that he almost didn't hear his name.

"What?" He asked.

"Did you find the info yet?" asked one of the goons.

"Just a min-"he was cut off when the computer blanked. The man blinked.

"What the Fuck?" He said out loud.

"What happened?" A different goon asked.

"The fucking screen just shut down."

It came back on. It started to type. Three of the goons came by and watched.

"What in all the holy hells?" one of them said.

_**You will love my sense of humor…**_

"Who the hell is this?" one of the goons asked. Kaiba's and Mokuba's eyes widened.

_**Jounouchi Katsuya**_

"Jounouchi Katsuya!?" the hacker yelled.

"Who's that?" one of the men asked.

"He's the best hacker in the world!" the hacker goon exclaimed. Everyone's eyes widened. Inside the bathroom, Yama and Jou were having fun.

_**If you get these files I will kill you…**_

"What are you going to do?" the hacker asked. The screen went blank again.

_**Bathroom**_

"Yama, you heard him," Jou said as he put the computer in front of his starving friend.

"Can I have the Hacker?" Yama asked. Jou nodded. Yama grinned and jumped in the screen.

_**Café**_

Growl…

"What the hell?" the hacker said as he stared closely at the screen. Red eyes appeared and the lights went out.

Growl…

"YAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!" the hacker screamed as the lights went on. The three goons stood with blood on them. The other three looked in horror at the sight before them. The hacker's body lay in the chair, but that was all. The hacker didn't have his head. Kaiba covered Mokuba's eyes. The screen came back on and started to write something.

_**Yum…**_

The café door's opened to show SRP officers. They held guns at the goons. The captain looked at the hacker's body and sighed.

"It seems someone was hungry…"

* * *

Tally: If yall want more then reviews!!!!

Robin: What is with all the Cliffhangers?

Tally: I need more suspense!!!!


	5. Home

Tally: Okay first, I would love to point out that I am a girl... and wanted to say thanx to _**Lyner137**_ and

_**Cat'sPaw666**_. I currently don't know why I asked that question so don't ask...

Robin: Don't worry...You'll never get an answer out of her.

Jou: Yep! Onee-Chan does not own YGO!!!! She and her bro are not sma- who the HELL wrote this script!?

Chaos: -Snicker-

* * *

_**Chapter 4**_

The SRP officers captured the thieves and got everyone to safety. They searched the whole cafe in hopes to finding clues as to who killed the hacker. When they came to the computer, it said one thing...

_**Go to the BR... **_

The captain knew what that meant for so he checked all the bathrooms, but found nothing. His lieutenant went to check the asexual bathroom. When the captain went to see his lieutenant, he was horrified to see blood, everywhere. He sighed.

"Wow, Jou sure did a number on the place," his lieutenant said. The captain nodded. His phone went off, so he picked it up.

"Hello?" he asked.

"Sorry about the mess..." the voice on the other end said.

"Jou, you could have just kept all of them alive?" The captain asked, "We have a brother of Seto Kaiba who is traumatized by the sight you played, and we could have found out what they were looking for."

"They were looking for the location of all the SRP teams. I was helping lighten their load and getting Yama some dinner," Was the reply he got. The phone beeped and that signaled that he had hung up. The captain sighed.

"Get all the blood cleaned up," he ordered. He, then, left for the SRP for some much needed rest.

_**With Jou**_

Jou was falling asleep when there was a knock on his door. He opened it to see the stuck-up snob, Kaiba. Jou raised his brow at the scowl he got from the brunette.

"What?" He asked.

"Where were you during the attack?" Kaiba asked.

"Well considering that I was the only one they didn't see, I called the police. Why?" Jou answered.

"Nothing," Kaiba began, but was cut off by Jou slamming the door in his face.

Yawn...

"Hey, Yama, you wake now?" Jou asked. Yama nodded.

(Tally: Okay, dudes, I will skip a week ahead cause after that, its just them staying under House Arrest.)

_**1 Week later**_

Today, Jou was finally going home. He was worried about what damage they did so when he got there, he laughed at the sight that met him. On the couch was Anzu and Marik, tied up and Ishizu cowering on the couch. His sister, Tally, was watching the news when she heard Jou laugh.

**Ishizu POV**

We never saw him so relaxed before. He was standing here in front of us and laughing. He's never done that in a long time. I looked over and saw Tally smirk and leave. I looked back at Jou and smiled. She never was the happy type.

**Normal POV**

Jou laughed like he hadn't laughed in years. Marik and Anzu glared at him, which didn't help the binds and made Jou laugh harder. Yama was on the floor, snickering. When Jou's outburst subsided he untied the two and decided it was time to catch up.

"What happened while I was gone?" Jou asked.

"The usual," Ishizu said as she untied Anzu and Marik, "Tally came by, tortured us and left. The only thing missing was you." Jou nodded at this.

"Okay, then... I'm going to go and hack into Persia's computer!" with that, Jou left.

* * *

Tally: Wow! I spent a week writing this!!!!

Robin: She was out killing people...

Tally: Shut up!!! I need more reviews!!!!


	6. Crazy!

Tally: Thanx _**Lyner137**_!!! I do love to torture people and I love to kill!!!!...Don't ask.

Robin: I guess they don't know what you look like, do they?

Tally: No... At the end of the chapter, I will describe myself!!!!

Jou: Onee-Chan does not own the show that I am co-starring in!!! Nor does she own the song!!!

* * *

_**Chapter 5**_

"AHHHH!!!!!" A voice echoed through the apartment building. Jou went in the living room with Yama at his heels. He was screaming and running from something. The others raised their eyebrows at the actions their leader was displaying.

"What happened?" Anzu asked. Jou stopped and panted.

"I hacked into Tally's computer by accident and now-"

"JOUNOUCHI!!!!!!" A voice cut him off. He whimpered as he said the last part.

"She's trying to kill me..." He ran out the front door. The others just blinked.

And blinked.

Until...

"Where is that little Mutt!?" Tally asked as she stomped into the room. Ishizu pointed to the front door and Tally blinked. She couldn't go outside and Jou knew that. Boy, was ha gonna get it. Tally stomped back to the back door and left for the agency.

_**With Jou**_

"A light in the hearts of many he touched. A star in the skies of scholars he was

And we of the renaissance give our ode, to the departed painter, Michelangelo!!!" Jou sang as he ran to the park. Michelangelo was one of his favorite painters. He also would love to quote things.

"Hey mutt," a voice startled Jou to death.

"Kaiba!!" Jou yelled at said CEO. Kaiba smirked.

"Was that a poem to Michelangelo you were saying?" Kaiba asked. Jou froze.

"Yeah, so?" Jou asked.

"I never knew that dogs could write poems let alone read them?" Jou growled.

_I am so going to have fun tonight!!!!_

"Goodbye, Rich Bastard!" With that Jou left.

_**That night **_(Tally: At this point, I got REALLY high...so it will be crazy!!!!)

"Mwahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!" Jou laughed as he looked in Set-Kaiba's!!!! K-A-I-B-A!!!!! Not Seto!!!! Window!!! ...

Anyway...

Jou looked in Kaiba's window and saw he was getting ready for bed. He smirked and grabbed the mike and proceeded to begin his fun.

"Deck my Ball's with falls of holly

Fa la la la la la la la la

Tis the season for the Dolly

Fa la la la la la la la la" Jou sang. Kaiba's eyes widened. He looked around to see where the sound was coming from. Jou continued to sing.

"You should meet him his name's Molly

Fa la la la la la la la la

For 50 Bucks, he'll make you jolly

Fa la la la la la la la la

See him in his gay apparel

Fa la la la la la la la la

You should meet his brother Carol

Fa la la la la la la la la!" Kaiba's eyes locked on the intercom. He glared at it. Jou finished the last verse of the song.

"Naughty girls are such a pleasure

Fa la la la la la la la la

These north poles were made for pleasure

Fa la la la la la la la la!!!!!" The singing stopped and Kaiba sighed in relief. There was a knock on his door. He opened it and Mokuba stood there like he had just heard that his brother was stripping. Jou laughed at the sight. Unfortunately for Jou, he had laughed so hard that Kaiba knew it was coming from his window. Jou hurried and left as Kaiba opened the window to see no one.

When Jou got home, he retired to his bedroom. Yama rose his eyebrow at Jou when he started to giggle.

"What did you do?" Yama asked. Jou giggled some more.

"I think I just scared Mokuba for life!" was the answer he got.

* * *

Tally: ok...I will not update unless I get at least 3 reviews!!!!!

Robin: She was hooked on Mt. Dew last night?

Jou: I think so?

Chaos: No I spiked her drink.

Tally: -runs out the window- Cowabunga!!!!!!

Don: Can she fly cause we're 5 stories high.

D: What did you do to my Hikari!?

Chaos: Since when do you care?

D: Because she will kill you when she find that it was you who spiked her drink and that I am the only one who can!!!!!

Robin: Please have more reviews...


	7. Intro

Tally: Thanx _**Lyner137**_, _**Cat'sPaw666**_, and _**Vampire servent Cerik**_ for reviewing!!!!!

Robin: Tally-san Are you ok?

Tally: Of course I am... I got Chaos back for spiking my drink...

Chaos: AHHHHH!!!!!!! RAPE!!!!!!!

Robin: -eyes widen- uh...

Tally: MWAHAHAH HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

Jou: Onee-Chan doesn't own YGO...

Tally: I wish I did...I wonder if I can put in Kazuki's will to let me inherit it?...Anyways... I said that I would describe what I look like so here goes.

Role the tape!!!!

Announcer: In a land not of this land-

Tally: Not that one!!!!!

Announcer: Well S-orry! I'm not the one who threw it out the window...

Tally: I did not!

Announcer: Did so!

Tally & Announcer: -Fight-

Jou: What are they? 20 and 34 or 2?

Robin: I'll tell you what she looks like... Tally-san has black waist length hair that has red highlight strips in them. She also has red eyes... I won't tell you what she wears unless you want me to.

Don: On to the story!!!!!!!

* * *

_**Chapter 6**_

Jou sighed as he relaxed on the couch. In the past two weeks, the Dark Court had been trying to kill the charges. Of course the charges noticed, but before they could run... the assassins were killed. Marik was on the floor sleeping and Anzu was on the luv seat reading. Ishizu had left earlier to report the activities of the Dark Court to Persia. She left two days ago. Just when Jou was dozing off, the tv screen came on signaling that Persia was going to talk to them. When he came on, they could see Tally next to him.

"Everyone," Persia started, "the Dark Court is getting impatient and want the clients dead."

"What do we do?" the now awake Marik asked.

"We will have them come here. They will need to know who you all are. They are to be with you 24-7. They will know about it and you all won't have to wear your disguises." Tally explained.

" The clients are on their way here," Persia said, "so I want you guys here-"

"Yesterday..." They said in unison. Persia nodded and the tv turned off. Jou got up and stretched. He took off his disguise and looked at the others who were now dressed as they were supposed to. (Tally: Refer to the prologue.) He smirked.

"Let's go," He said as he grabbed his laptop and headed to the window. Yama was not a cat nor were the others in disguises. He perched himself on Jou's neck. Anzu was holding Yuki and jumped out the window. Marik was next and Tohru was in tow. Jou jumped out last and they were soon at the agency.

_**Agency**_

When they got there, they saw the others talking. Persia was explaining to them and Tally was getting ready to kill Bakura.

"What do you mean you have agents who were watching us for 5 years!?" Bakura shrieked. Mokuba was startled.

"Is it the AT team who were watching us?" he asked. Persia nodded.

"So what do you want now?" Ryou asked.

"I was wondering the same thing," Yami said. Yugi was in a daze as to when he found out he was being stalked for 5 years.

"When do we meet the stalkers?" Kaiba asked.

"I guess you want to get back at Jou for spying through your window?" Tally said. Yugi took notice of her.

"Who're you?" He asked.

"I am Pheonix D. Tally," She said. She looked at the ceiling and saw Jou and the others. She smirked, "Why don't you meet your protectors?"

"You may come down now," Persia said. Marik was the first to jump down. They didn't notice him.

"Hi guys!" He said. They turned and saw him.

"MALIK!?" They all yelled. He just nodded.

"Everyone, meet Marik. He is the fighter in the team and has been watching Bakura and Ryou," Persia said.

"WHAT!?" Bakura yelled. Marik nodded.

"Sorry to have lied to you," He said, "This is what I really look like!"

Tohru flew down on Marik's shoulder and nodded.

"Hello," He said. Jou and Anzu got an idea of an entrance. Anzu made a clock a appear. It soon disappeared and in it's place was Anzu.

"Tea, you too?!" Yugi asked. Anzu nodded.

"Anzu is the specialist. That is what she really looks like and she loves clocks," Persia said, "She's been watching over Yami and Yugi."

"I'm just surprised that Malik didn't blow our cover again," she said.

"If I remember correctly, Marik did ground him!" Jou said as he entered as a burst of flame. It soon subsided and revealed Jou with Yama around his neck. Yuki and Tohru were arguing about something.

"The Mutt!?" Kaiba exclaimed.

"Hi Kaiba," Jou growled, showing his fangs. His red eyes showed anger.

"This is Jou. He's the hacker whose been hacking into almost everyone's computer. He's also my dear little brother," Tally said as she appeared behind Jou with a pole. She hit him with the pole and he hid behind Anzu for safety, "And if you don't want to be a dead brother, you'll stop hacking in to my computer!!!!!"

"Ow!" Jou said.

"Jou has been watching over Kaiba and Mokuba," Persia said. Mokuba's eyes widened.

"Jou, you wrote that on Seto's computer and killed that thief?" Mokuba asked.

"I didn't kill him," Jou said. Mokuba sighed, "Yama ate him."

Yami and Bakura started at him. Mokuba turned green and Ryou's eyes got big. Yugi was cowering behind Yami and Kaiba looked as pale as a vampire. Marik and Anzu just blinked.

"Wow, you didn't cause another war?" Anzu asked.

"Another!?" They all asked. Persia and Marik chuckled. Tally just smirked.

"He did cause the Korean War...," Marik said. Persia shook his head.

"All because he wanted to kill people," he said.

"He caused World War 1 and 2," Tally said. Yugi, Ryou, and Mokuba gasped, "And then there was the Crusade..."

"Don't forget the Civil War!" Anzu piped in.

"Well. I'm not the one who started the Boston Tea party, or the French and Indian War!" Jou said, Eying Anzu.

"Hey I'm not the one who decided to start world wide massacres!" Anzu countered.

"Did you start any war's?" Yugi asked Marik hopefully.

"Yep!!" he said, "Started the Revolutionary War!"

"Anyway," Persia said, "They will have to be with you at all times."

"So have fun!" Tally said as she whisked them away with a wave of her hand. Kaiba, Mokuba and Jou ended up at Kaiba Mansion. Yami, Yugi, and Anzu ended up at Yugi's house. I'll let you guess where the other 3 ended up at.

* * *

Tally: Wow was that fast or what?-Stabs Announcer-

Robin: How many do you want this time?

Tally: FOUR!!!!!!!

Jou: Onee-Chan wants four reviews...


	8. Blood

Tally: AHHH!!!! Itchy!!!!

Robin:We went to a family outing for Jou-san's school. It was me, Tally-san, Ace-san, Jou-san, and their father...

Jou: Onee-chan stepped in poison oak!!!!

D: So did I!!!!!!!!!

Chaos: We expected that ta happen...

Don: You are here alter ego!!!

Tally: I don't own anything except me, D, the Dark Order, and Robin!!!!!!

* * *

_**Chapter 7**_

Jou groaned for the fourth time in the past 10 minutes. Mokuba and Kaiba had been staring at him for that time period. At first it was cool, seeing the Seto Kaiba staring at you! But now, it was just plain disturbing!! Jou growled.

"Why don't you take a fucking picture, it lasts longer!!!" He growled. Kaiba and Mokuba flinched. Kaiba soon got up and headed out the living room door.

"Where are you going?" Jou asked.

"I have work to do," Kaiba said and was about to leave, but was stopped when Yama hissed.

"You'd better sit your ass back in that seat," Jou said. Kaiba ignored him and left. Jou's eyes narrowed. He got up and walked out the door to see no CEO. He turned back to the silent Mokuba.

"Where did he go?" Jou asked. Mokuba blinked.

"To his office...," Mokuba answered. There was an explosion sound down the hall. Jou ran with Yama and Mokuba at his heels to the source of the noise. They entered a room. It looked like an office but now it looked like a tornado came through it. In the middle of the room, a Tao was holding Kaiba by the neck. The Tao looked like all Taos. It was a pale man looking doll with traditional Chinese clothing on.

Jou glared at the doll. He ran and kicked its arm so Kaiba fell onto the ground. He then, knocked down the offending dummy and straightened its arm so Jou was holding it behind its back, with his foot on the Tao's back and the Tao on the floor. Kaiba and Mokuba were on the other side of the room with Yama. The mini Red Eyes growled. No one could tell who sent the Tao. It could have been Anubis for all the Agents knew!!!

"Who sent you?" Jou asked. The Tao stayed silent. Jou bended his arm a little. He received a hiss.

"Who sent you?" Jou asked again.

"Like I would tell you anything!" The Tao exclaimed. Jou bent his arm a little more.

"You just attacked my charge and I don't take lightly to that," Jou hissed, "Now tell me WHO sent you and I won't have Yama eat you!"

Yama grinned, showing his dragon teeth. He began to enlarge himself so now he was a full grown dragon. His tail was out the window and his wings were wrapped around his back. This all so he wouldn't break the mansion. The Tao gulped.

"The Dark Court," The Tao said. Jou grinned.

"Thank you," with that said, Jou let go of the doll's arm and grabbed his neck. He sunk his teeth into the flesh and tore it apart.

"I thought you said you wouldn't kill me!" The Tao cried.

"I said that Yama wouldn't eat you, not me," Jou continued to eat away at the doll. Yama hid Kaiba and Mokuba behind his wings. When Jou was done, the Tao turned to dust.

"Damn, Jou, when was the last time you ate?" Yama growled. Jou wiped the blood dripping on his face.

"A month or two, why?" Jou asked.

"Because you just ate a Tao," Yama said, "You ate a Tao _whole_!"

Jou's face paled.

"Ew! I ate that disgusting thing!?" Jou pretended to gag. Yama's eyes narrowed.

"Did you say you haven't eaten in a month?" He growled. Jou smiled sheepishly.

"Maybe?"

"Jounouchi Katsuya!!!!!" Yama yelled, "Why haven't you eaten anything for _two_ months!?"

"I only said one!" Jou protested.

"You said one or two!" Yama exclaimed, "The latter is more predictable!!!"

"What's so bad about it?" Jou asked.

"You need blood!!! This is worse then you starting the Holocaust!!!" Yama growled.

"You started the Holocaust?" Mokuba asked. Jou nodded.

"Mutt, what was that?" Kaiba asked.

"That would be a reason, and next time I say I want you to stay somewhere, you stay! _Esta' bien_?" Jou asked. They nodded, "Good, now go pack up you things. Your moving into my house for the time being."

"Why should we?" Kaiba asked. Jou growled.

"Because you could be attacked in this big ass house you have, because I just ate a Tao, because I don't have the stomach for whatever your cook is cooking, because your giving me a migraine, because its easier to watch you there, because if you don't, I'll have you thrown out of your office window, 60 flights off the ground!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Jou yelled. Kaiba nodded and left with his brother to pack. Jou groaned.

"What's wrong?" Yama asked.

"Got any Tylenol?" Jou asked.

* * *

Tally: I'm not itch anymore!!

Robin: Ahh...

Tally: Its my birthday on Sunday!!!!!!!

Jou: Review people if you want here to update!!!!!!!!!!

Tally: I want three reviews!!! Or more!!!!! Feed the author...


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